FOMO: The cycle of exhaustion explained
Being a student in times like these is extremely challenging. It should be both acknowledged and addressed. It is particularly hard to question the globally accepted saying “Grab every opportunity”, unless we recognize that not every opportunity has to be availed by everyone. Collectively, we aim for success and not fatigue. Now that mental health has so much public attention, it is important to identify our centres of stress and anxiety and manage it.
After all, dealing with roadblocks leads to character building and then we can approach problems differently.

Image from Unsplash.com by @tonikoraza
Understanding FOMO basics
Before delving into the problem at hand, it is important to understand the problem itself. FOMO, Fear Of Missing Out, in a nutshell is “Am I doing enough? Are not the others doing more?”
It is so prevalent that it officially made its way in the Oxford English dictionary in 2013. The range of this fear could be from as trivial as missing the notification of a social media post to missing an important deadline. What stays common is how Przybylski et al. (2013) puts it, the “pervasive apprehension that others might be having rewarding experiences from which one is absent”. The problem stems from one’s unhappiness and leads to anxiety and unhappiness creating a toxic cycle. The fact that it is trending as a hashtag on every social media platform today in 2021, does not mean the phenomenon is new. The phrase itself was coined by Dr. Dan Herman as early as in 2000.
So, what is the real problem?
Awareness about the activities of our peers is beneficial in several aspects but it also acts as a double-edged sword.
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It creates an internal turmoil as everyone compares their individual reality with someone’s portrayed reality. Research by Sabatani et al. (2016) shows how we unconsciously compare our lives with others resulting in personal dissatisfaction. An unmade trip, an unachieved task, a missed gathering and even an unread book juxtaposed against consciously created social media posts by others can trigger a sense of competition and lead to severe physical as well as mental exhaustion. Its effect surfaces in adjusting in colleges, studying abroad as well as influences the innate academic motivation (Hayran et al. 2020). Gigen Mammoser, a writer for VICE tech news, points out that FOMO can engender regret for an event that has not even occurred. Does this fear discriminate? No. Studies highlight that everyone, irrespective of their gender, age, geographical location and origin is prone to this fear. Research suggests that our social media consumption and smartphones have a direct link to FOMO (Wolniewicz et al. 2018). As students, the FOMO can be further explained in different parameters. For students the fear is not limited to social media. Students globally are in a competitive run to achieve and rightfully so. As Professor Barry Schwartz writes in his book ‘The paradox of choice’ (2004) that, paying attention to others is pervasive since every best opportunity, like best colleges and best jobs are granted to those who are better than their peers. Everyone wants to excel in every realm. Extra subjects, extra content for CV, extra of the extracurricular activities, extra exertion to have a social life and, extra tab on every releasing scholarship. All this is measured in a relative scale of other’s achievement. Hence, even when one of the aspects of our overambitious list seems weak, we crush under FOMO. The social software that very aids interaction and helps us stay connected is also the very tool that creates FOMO. Our education system is demanding. With progressing education comes the increasing requirement for higher-grade averages, publications, conferences and research proposals. In addition, everyone is striving for the best but there is very fine line that can help us sustain our mental balance. We need to calm down. Anxiety, stress and fears come in different forms and intensities. Humans as we are, we are susceptible to these fears and that is OKAY. Our character is defined by how we deal with our problems. Answer this, ‘Do you have FOMO or do you know someone who does?’ Yes/No. If yes, there is nothing else you are missing out or need to rush to. We are literally on the same page! Stay tuned for Part 2 where we highlight how to deal with FOMO. References Hayran, C., Anik, L., & Gürhan-Canli, Z. (2020). A threat to loyalty: Fear of missing out (FOMO) leads to reluctance to repeat current experiences. PloS one, 15(4), e0232318. Herman D. (2000). Introducing short-term brands: A new branding tool for a new consumer reality. Journal of Brand Management. J Brand Manag 7, 330–340. doi:10.1057/bm.2000.23 Przybylski AK, Murayama K, DeHaan CR, Gladwell V. (2013). Motivational, emotional, and behavioral correlates of fear of missing out. Computers in Human Behavior.; 29: 1841–8. Sabatini, F., & Sarracino, F. (2016). Keeping up with the e-Joneses: Do online social networks raise social comparisons? Schwartz, B. (2004). The paradox of choice. United States: Harper Perennial. Vice.com. 2021. We Asked Some Psychologists to Explain the Science Behind Your Crippling FOMO. [online] Available at: <https://www.vice.com/en/article/z453qy/we-asked-some-psychologists-to-explain-the-science-behind-your-crippling-fomo> [Accessed 11 August 2021]. Wolniewicz CA, Tiamiyu MF, Weeks JW, Elhai JD. (2018). Problematic smartphone use and relations with negative affect, fear of missing out, and fear of negative and positive evaluation. Psychiatry Res.262:618-623.Target group: Students
Author:
Assistant Editor
at GiLE Journal
of Skills Development
- August 16, 2021

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